I'll be honest. I got cold feet. This time last week I was still in England, enjoying spending time with my friends and family and seriously considering not coming back to Malta. I felt heavy, weighed down by choices and decisions. Time and time again I went for long walks, accompanied only by the thoughts in my mind, the pros and cons of both staying and going back. The more I thought about it, the further away I felt about making a decision. And then suddenly, without even really realising it, I knew what I was going to do - the day before my flight.
It occurred to me that right now, there isn't anything left in Leeds which could have made me stay. (Apart from my family of course, but I knew that they were happy for me to go.) A chain of events led to me acknowledge that a gap year 1500 miles away isn't such a bad idea. During my 10 days at home, I tied up the loose ends that were holding me down. I collected my exam results, passed my driving test, packed up the rest of my things and said goodbye to people properly - although I try not think of it as 'goodbye' but more of a 'see you later' because it's not forever, it's just a little longer than usual.
But anyway, the point is, I'm ready. I wasn't entirely sure before. I pretended to be sure because it was only for four weeks. But now I'm here for a year and I know I made the right choice in coming back. Let's face it, I would have only moaned and regretted it had I not.
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