Is it just me, or was 2013 the fastest year yet? In my opinion, time seems to be moving faster than I can appreciate the days. Even though 2014 has only just begun, summer will have been and gone (although I get a much longer and better one living here on this sunny island) and the festive season will be back before we know it.
The start of the new year brings me the opportunity of looking for another job as hotels are beginning to reopen and vacancies are appearing. Another opportunity arising is the availability of places at The University of Malta. I recently checked my emails to find that The University of Liverpool had declined my application. Okay, I had no intentions of going anymore anyway because I want to start my life properly here in Malta but the rejection has knocked my confidence severely. Not only am I waiting for a call that should have rang yesterday from a job interview that I had last week, I'm terrified that The University of Malta will not want me either. To be honest, I don't think I can take much more and if it weren't so cold outside, I'd consider throwing myself in the sea.
These lack of options are forcing me to look at new options for myself. But what I am supposed to look at when I don't even know what other options appeal to me? How, at nineteen years old, am I supposed to know what I want to do with my life when a degree might not be an option anymore and most employers value either a degree or 'life experience' and I don't have either of those things?
Granted, I might be freaking out a bit too much but when all these things happen at once, it kind of hits you a little harder than if they happened six months apart. There are part time and full time courses available at a college here but if I don't know what career I want, how am I supposed to know which course to apply for?
There is also an extreme option which could help me get into The University of Malta if my application is rejected first time... I could go back to school full time and sit exams until I get enough credits to be accepted onto the course that I want. Why is it extreme? Ever moved to a new school where everyone is already friends and you're the new kid? Try doing that at nineteen years old. I can't just walk up to someone and say ''Want to play tea parties with me?'' like a brave five year old would. Children are brave and the older we get, the less brave we are. Social expectations and caring too much about what other people think stops us from saying what we really mean and doing what we really want - unless you're the kind of person who has the balls to do those things.
So maybe it's time to break my unfortunate chain of rejection, be headstrong about the person I want to be and grow a pair!
